Jak sie masz? My name Borat. I like you. I like sex. Is nice!

If you guys haven't crawled out of your post-bar glory holes to see Sacha Baron Cohen as Borat, you don't deserve to get sworn in this Friday night. It was amazing. The kind of amazing that only comes along once in a blue moon. Go see it now! Seriously. Like now. Right f-ing now. With your parents. Not.

I made the mistake of seeing this flick with my mom and step-dad who thankfully are two of the most chill people in the world. However, I would NOT recommend that anyone else see this movie with their parental unit. There was one part where, regardless of how amazingly open-minded my parents are, I just had to cover my face with my hands. All I'm going to say, without giving away the entire scene, is that it had to do with two naked men. One man was straddling another man's face and pretty much rubbing his asshole on his moustache. Did I say too much? I mean full frontal male nudity is one thing, but holy crap!!!! I have NEVER seen anything that rivaled this scene in terms of its grotesque factor. And this, coming from someone who made it a career of watching gay-midget-fifty-year-old porn just for shits and giggles. That should adequately describe the icky-ness of this scene. And if it doesn't, there's this nice little part shortly thereafter where Borat tells his little buddy that his moustache still tastes of his testes. Ok, wrong. Just plain wrong. On sooo many levels. Not to mention especially wrong to someone who is watching it with the woman who gave birth to her.

So there I am sitting in the movie theater (at this point I literally had to move so I was a seat away from my parents) and while I'm embarrassed as all hell, I look over at my mother and step-father and they're practically falling out of their chairs they're laughing so hard. Nice. I'm completely embarrassed and they don't even realize I'm sitting right next to them. F-ing brilliant.

So after I mentally regrouped and got over the whole cock and ball sideshow, (never did I move back to my original seat I might add) things calmed down and I was only forced to see a few more ass shots before the credits started rolling. Then, as my family and I are walking outside, my step-dad leans over to me and says, "Oksana huh? I think our Oksana is a little different than the one in that movie. Ours is a hot little piece of ass." Oh gee. Thanks step-dad. Thanks sooo much for that. Hell, at that point I was just thankful I didn't have to hear the word "vagine" anymore that anything would have been music to my ears. But Okie, if you're reading this, my apologies. You know we all think you're hot, but apparently my step-dad and his little manly-man club worship you as well.

So there you have it. Borat was absolutely killer dammit.

Quote of the day:
Borat Sagdiyev: What kind of car can I buy that attract woman with shaved vagine?
Car Dealership owner: That would be a Corvette.